The lover boy is not new. He has nothing to do with ‘love’. In the past, loverboys were simply called pimps. Suddenly they were called loverboys. Now we just call them pimps again. Loverboys or pimps aim to make a lot of money from girls and/or young women, often by forcing them to work in prostitution or to transport drugs. Boys can also be recruited by pimps. Pimps try to find victims via the internet or, for example, through nightlife. By first making a girl fall in love and investing some money in her, these types of boys/men suddenly expect something in return after a while. She has to have sex for money, or they ask a victim to transport drugs. Loverboys are pimps who deceive vulnerable (mostly young) people with the aim of making a lot of money from them through forced prostitution or sometimes drug smuggling. Victims can be seduced by making them fall in love, but kidnapping is unfortunately also not unthinkable. Falling in love with someone can happen in everyday life, but also via the internet. Young vulnerable girls are often victims.
What is a pimp or loverboy?
- A pimp is a man who makes money from young women (sometimes also young boys) who are forced to engage in prostitution. A Loverboy is a nice word for a pimp. So the word pimp boy is actually more appropriate. Pimps line their pockets with the money they earn from vulnerable girls (sometimes boys) who, for example, believe that the pimp is in love with them.
- The word ‘pimp’ is an old word. It is also used for men who offer protection to a prostitute (commonly called a ‘whore’) from troublesome or dangerous clients who want to have sex with the prostitute. At the same time, a pimp can find clients for a prostitute. The words ‘whore’ and ‘pimp’ have very negative connotations and are often used as swear words. This is of course not always correct. There are also many prostitutes who voluntarily have sex for money, and there are also pimps who could use the word patron.
- However, a loverboy is a pimp (a man or young man) who deliberately tries to make a girl or woman fall in love by then forcing her to work in prostitution or to exploit her financially in some other way. He wants to make the girl fall in love because this gives him power over his victim.
Grooming via the internet
The Internet has become a fishing pond for pimps. The pimp uses chat sites, dating sites and/or social media to find vulnerable victims. They know how to make the victims feel good by complimenting them and by doing their best to make the victims fall in love with them a little. Pimps also often manage to lure victims into committing sexual acts in front of the webcam, so that they can then blackmail them with the footage. Victims of these types of people are often seduced into doing things they would normally not give in to through manipulation and blackmail, but also by promising a great future with love and lots of money. They can also be forced to have sex. Vulnerable girls and boys are increasingly being abused via the internet, with the aim of exploiting them as quickly as possible.
Pimp, lover boy
The classic lover boy or pimp first makes a girl fall in love, but nowadays people often work via the internet and there is also increasingly a more aggressive approach, such as drugging a victim and holding him in a home. Once a girl is in love with a so-called lover boy, he separates the girl from her parents, school, friends and family as much as possible. A pimp or lover boy works without conscience. It is a strategy to first make a girl fall in love or interested, to give her compliments and gifts, to win her over more and more and to arouse romantic feelings in her and, for example, to deflower her, with only one goal: ultimately to get her to enter prostitution or make money from it in some other way. The aim is to make a lot of money from the exploitation of victims who are forced into prostitution. The stories you hear about the behavior of loverboys or pimps are quite stereotypical:
- The pimp/lover boy can be an attractive boy.
- A pimp/lover boy gives gifts and attention to young women to impress them.
- They pick girls who are vulnerable.
- They often choose girls who are not as intelligent.
- They seek out victims who clearly crave attention and compliments.
- The lover boy/pimp wears expensive clothes and jewelry while it remains unclear how he can afford it all. For example, he also drives an expensive car.
- He gives expensive things to his victims.
- He often gives a cell phone so that he can always reach the girl.
- He tries to make the girl fall in love with him and impress her.
- He tries to separate his victims from family and friends.
- He manipulates more and more and eventually gives the girl the feeling that she owes him something.
- At some point he expects her to have sex with someone else to avoid certain problems.
- He demands that she prostitute herself.
- He increasingly works via the internet and can blackmail his victims by making recordings of sexual acts (for example) via the webcam.
A pimp has only one goal: to make money from girls who are in prostitution. When a girl comes into contact with a pimp or lover boy and falls under his spell, parents are often at a loss. Close family ties and critical friends are only a burden to loverboys/pimps, so he never misses an opportunity to tell the girl that her parents keep her too tight. Friendships are also often destroyed through manipulation, so that the lover boy/pimp gains more and more power over his victim. He tries to stir up the relationships the girl has because it is easier for him to achieve his goal if she has become completely dependent on him. He regularly tries to achieve his goal with drugs. Once the girl becomes dependent on her new boyfriend, he forces her to do prostitution under the guise of: I have incurred so much debt to spoil and help you, now I am in financial trouble because of you.’ Or he says he is being threatened because of a debt. The girl is in love and is persuaded to have sex with someone else in order to help him. The girl may also be forced into prostitution. She could be kidnapped or lured abroad.
Unfortunately, the love of a lover boy is not a bed of roses
For a lover boy/pimp, a girl is not a valuable person with feelings, but an object. Some loverboys take away the girl’s passport, other IDs, mobile phone, all money and freedom. She has to have sex with clients for money, which the pimp immediately pockets. If something like this happens to you, try to get out of the situation. You have become the victim of a pimp. Your family and friends will be overjoyed if you manage to get out of that situation. It’s not you who should be ashamed that this happened to you, but the boy who put you in that situation is a shame. Therefore, seek help.
How do you recognize a lover boy?
A lover boy often has a smooth and/or handsome appearance. He knows how to win over girls very well by making her feel special to him. He wears expensive clothes and/or jewelry, drives around in luxury cars or shows in some other way that he has money. Usually he can talk and lie pretty well. He can tell a sad story about a relationship that he wants to get out of because he thinks you are so beautiful and wonderful. He gives a lot of compliments and/or gifts. He talks about true love and calls you the most beautiful, the only one, the true one, the sweetest. Be wary if:
- A boy gives you expensive gifts, while it remains unclear how he got so much money.
- You are approached via the internet by a boy who starts talking about sex and who wants you to perform sexual acts via the webcam.
- Boys who invite you to meet up somewhere even though you don’t know them at all.
- Boys/men who talk negatively about your parents and/or negatively about your friends.
- A boy or man that others warn you about.
- A boy who asks you to solve problems by having sex with someone else.
Never show yourself naked to anyone on the internet, you can never know if you are being filmed or photographed.
By the way, real love cannot be bought, so when a date gives you expensive gifts or makes beautiful promises, ask yourself what he really wants from you. Don’t accept everything. Say that you don’t want expensive gifts so that no one can make you feel guilty later. Use your brain. If you do accept expensive gifts, never let yourself be made to feel guilty afterwards because you received those expensive things. Just give the presents back when he starts talking about it. Read about loverboys or pimps. Someone who really loves you will not ask you to have sex with someone else. He also won’t ask you to have sex with him through a screen.
read more
- Dating the wrong person: wrong men, wrong women
- Dating the wrong person: the jealous partner
- Dating the wrong person: the cheater and the scammer
- Dating the Wrong One: Compulsive Seductresses
- Dating bad men: the misogynist and the mama’s boy