Some parents want their child to achieve at all costs. Parents have extremely high expectations of their child, which often cannot meet them. Parents should leave that and teach their child to gain self-confidence.
High expectations of children: the government also encourages them
High expectations of children, they are already dictated by the government. The Ministry of Education and the Education Council already require this from their teachers, because this is the only way they can motivate children to achieve the best results. Because everyone must be highly educated, that’s the motto. The fact that this is a utopia and often leaves children paralyzed is often forgotten.
Having high expectations of children is dangerous
Anyone who has high expectations of their child has expectations. The child must then comply with this. It is not about hope or good harmonious development, but about what the child should become in the eyes of others. But where is the loving way of following the child to what he or she really is and encouraging what is there? Because what a child can ultimately achieve cannot be achieved with a pattern of expectations. That is within the child itself and depends on what the child can and wants to achieve.
Message to the child: This is good, but next time it must be even better
There are plenty of parents who constantly give their children the message that this time it was good, but that next time it must be even better. This puts enormous pressure on young children’s shoulders. But it can also lead to people who, even when they are elderly, still wonder whether they are doing well enough.
Cognitive performance: children need to perform a lot as early as possible
Things are no different in education. Children increasingly have to perform cognitive tasks in the form of reading, writing and arithmetic. Toddlers and preschoolers should already be able to write letters and name numbers. But the fact that a toddler or color plays very nicely and puts all his or her creativity into it is forgotten. While this is also very important for the further development of a young mind. The message that the government is giving is that this is not important. Cuts are constantly being made in all these areas, even though children have to learn to count, write and read at an increasingly younger age.
Children who withdraw because they have to perform too much
The result is often that children withdraw when they have to perform too much and they are not (yet) ready for it or never will be. They no longer feel comfortable at school or at another lesson (sports or music) and don’t want to do anything anymore. In this way, what parents and school want has a reverse effect.
Help toddlers and preschoolers develop self-confidence: that is the basis for success
However, anyone who chooses a completely different path and helps toddlers and preschoolers develop self-confidence without having to perform much will help them get on a much better path. They then naturally want to learn something or indicate that they can do it themselves. Only the expectations of the child themselves ultimately determine the success they will have. Parents who encourage them in their early years to do things that they are not yet ready for or do not feel like doing will eventually be punished because these expectations can completely paralyze the child.