If your child goes to primary school, you can expect that sooner or later he/she will ask if a friend can come and play at his/her home. If this is your first time, it can be quite a scary or nervous experience for you as a parent. However, you don’t know exactly what to expect.
Playing is healthy
Whether or not you like having another child home for a playdate, realize that it is good for your child. A child must learn to build and maintain social contacts, whether at school, outside or at home. In addition, your child will probably be invited to play somewhere, which will also provide new social experiences. For example, the fact that things are different in every house, different rules, different environment, etc.
Make agreements with the parents
Before a play date can take place, it is useful to discuss some matters with the parent(s). For example, whether you should take into account special features of their child (in behavior or food). If the child is busy or very calm, it is useful to know so that you know what to expect. Moreover, you also want to know whether the child should not eat certain foods or is perhaps even allergic to them. In addition, the parents of your child’s boyfriend want to know where you live or perhaps what they are going to do. Don’t forget to exchange telephone numbers in case the child gets homesick or if there is a disagreement between the two children.
How long, where and when?
In the lower grades, the children are often free earlier on Wednesday afternoons, which makes this Wednesday afternoon particularly popular for a play date. Because an afternoon of playing does not have to last very long – two or three hours is sufficient – it is possible at some schools almost every weekday. It is up to you whether you want to use weekends for this, but parents usually find a weekday fits into the schedule a little better. Because you can of course decide to take the children somewhere (playground, park, etc.) instead of to your house, you must inform the parents. After all, they need to know where to take the child (if he or she does not come with you after school) and where and when the child should be picked up again. Usually a play date only lasts a few hours and the children are picked up again before dinner time. If the child comes to play during lunch time, it is nice that the child simply has lunch at your home. This is also very exciting for your own child. It is important that you as a parent know whether or not a child likes something or is allergic to something.
What is too often?
You will notice that one child has a play date more often than the other child. This is up to you as a parent and the parent(s) of the other child. Many parents like it if their child often goes out to play somewhere or brings a friend home, but some parents think once a week is enough. It is important to gauge your child’s reactions and behavior. If you notice that it makes your child very busy or nervous, it is better to limit it to ensure peace and quiet with your own child. Then simply make agreements with your child about how often he/she can play somewhere and how often someone can come and play with him or her. If your child thinks once a week is not enough and cannot choose between friends, you can also decide that your child can invite two children.
How do you keep the children busy?
Perhaps this question is the one that concerns you most. Sometimes it is necessary to keep children busy, but most of the time this is not really necessary. Children often have enough time together and keep each other entertained. So take a look at it first. If you notice that the children are becoming restless or bored, give them some suggestions and, if necessary, prepare something for them to do. It is nice to put some snacks and drinks on the table.
Prepare something
If you notice that the children no longer know what to do, suggest something yourself. Some ideas:
- clay
- to craft
- to paint
- to bake cookies
- play a board game
- play a card game
- to colour
Help the children prepare the things. With cookie baking you can bake the cookies and they can then decorate them, for example.
Out and about!
If there is a park or playground or petting zoo near the house, you can take the children there. If your child is old enough to go here alone, you could also let the children go alone. Remember that you are also responsible for the other child at that time, so it might be useful to keep an eye on things every now and then.